What do you think

[HeavenLeigh]

About dating someone of a different race?

[veda]

gawd, i'm a genuine HT junkie today... sooo many print-job saved up for one day!! blahblahblah

I'm in a mixed race relationship now & have been in a few in the past. I think it makes sense & it helps me grow, learning about other ways of life. Life is SO big!! Everytime I feel like I have evolved, I learn something that makes me take another step and then I feel small again, I love that (my opinion) & I'm happy that my kids won't need to worry about anything further than character & integrity when choosing a mate either. It just seems more free to me??

How do you feel about it Krysti??

[Mommy_To_Jordon]

I'm in a mixed relationship also...my husband is Mexican, and I'm white...so...as you can tell it doesn't matter to me what color someone is

[suzieq728]

I was also in a mixed relationship, I didnt have a problem with it, but others did.
My son is mixed, now he is another story. I thought at one time, that he had the best of both worlds, but, today he is a very confused young man, trying very hard to figure out where he fits in. It's sad because I didnt raise him this way, but socitey in general has sort of pushed him back & forth. Am I black, or am I white? That is his question. I tell him all the time you are both and he should enjoy both races, learn all he can about both. I dont think he buys it though.
The sadest part is that even some of my family members want nothing to do with him due to the color of his skin, and his fathers family as well feels the same. So I guess that is where the confusion comes in.
When he was small I used to watch him playing with other children, only praying that he would be spared this confusion.
For now, this is life. Someday, I know the world will be a better place, (like when people like Josephmorgan get a life LOL).
;)
I love my son very much, I feel his pain....My only wish for him is that one day he knows just how special he really is...

[Csara]

Even though hubby and I are two peas in a pod, I think race/religion/color/gender etc. has no bearing on love whatsoever. It's ALL good! ;)

[veda]

aww, suzie, people can be ignorant & cruel. But i think we found something much larger than this when JosephMorgan found us... & that is the realization that there are people with backwoods beliefs & unreal "solutions" to race mixtures who will seek to cause pain. You, however are a true living solution. Keep on keepin' on, yk?? Your family is blessed through your eyes, & yes it'll get easier. Just so you know, it's rough on a "purebred" these days too (from a VERY distant friend's point of view - we're not close, but he was worried about this a few yrs ago & then realized that it was all about what HE projected to his future family over his basic looks.) don't know if that helps, hopefully:)

[suzieq728]

Thanks Veda.. Believe it or not it does help to hear that...

I am sure that one day my son will over come his dilemma and get on with life.. But until then, its hard for him, and even harder for me watching him go threw this.
He is very shy, but, he has brought home girlfriends, (if I may say so myself, the young man is a cutie LOL). One girl was white, one black, and yet another spanish, and I always encourage him never to stick to just one race, to be sure he finds someone, no matter what color or relgion, or creed that he loves and returns the love. I just want to see him happy.... And I want him to know that (as you put it) the world is a BIG.... I love the way you expressed it... ;)

[Mel-icious]

Originally posted by Csara
Even though hubby and I are two peas in a pod, I think race/religion/color/gender etc. has no bearing on love whatsoever. It's ALL good! ;)

Couldn't have said it better myself C! ;)

[Margarita]

Well, my hubby is half-Mexican, so that's my answer. :D

[missyk]

I definitely would date someone of another race or culture, if I wasn't married of course. ;) The only thing that matters to me is that I respect the person's mind and beliefs and that I am attracted to the person. It disgusts me that people in this day and age are ignorant enough to believe that the color of a person's skin could actually have an effect on the person's intelligence or moralality. Its the way you were raised and your environment that determines what kind of person you are, not your ethnicity. That's why I know white people that I wouldn't pee on if they were on fire, and my biggest role model is a black woman.

[Deana]

David and I are a "homogeneous" couple. I don't have issues with people that date people that aren't exactly like them though.

I've dated a couple of men that were a different race so I don't have a problem with it. I never fell in love, but that had nothing to do with their skin color or belief system.

I will say though that other people aren't very good at containing their expressions of shock. I briefly dated a black man a long time ago, and I'll never forget the feeling of people staring at me when we walked into a bar arm in arm. It really pissed me off. Society is weird about seeing non-traditional couples. In all honesty, I think my dad would have completely freaked out if I would have brought home someone of a different race.

[luv2cook]

There is absolutely nothing wrong with mixing it up! Love is love. I feel if we weren't meant to be together, than we all wouldn't have been put here on this earth together.:) Just because other people are iggnorant or uncomfortable with it, doesn't mean it shouldn't be. We have inter-racial families in our family. And most often, it's the ones that are "afraid of what they don't know" that cause the waves.

[FarmGirl]

Never judge a book by its cover... just as you never judge a person by their skin tone. We're all the same underneath, so who cares if there are "mixed race" relationships? The people who matter won't care, and the people who care don't matter. I see nothing wrong whatever! :D

[meliz]

I agree, totally. Race should not even come into play. But sadly, for lots of people, it still does. A good friend of mine (who is white) is married to a black guy... they have two boys. The other day this woman comes into my friend's shop and sees the pic of the boys that my friend proudly displays and says "Oh look at the cute little black boys." Astounding. I don't think this woman was trying to be malicious... But the added "black" qualification speaks volumes and shows how embedded prejudice still is.

[Turtleheadfred]

I chose to vote finding love no matter the race, creed, etc. Society has come a long way, but it still has quite a way to come. I always say that one day we'll all be a beautiful shade of caramel and won't wrinkle so badly in the sun:D ! But some people do have problems with it.

From how it's been explained to me (by friends who don't agree with it) it's more a matter of differing cultures than races. They seem to feel more that the cultural and religions basics need to be upheld and remembered and don't want that changed --- that's what they disapprove of more that black, white, hispanic, asian, etc. And is tends to be older individuals more than younger ones.

Just FYI!:cool:

[Sydneyp]

From how it's been explained to me (by friends who don't agree with it) it's more a matter of differing cultures than races. They seem to feel more that the cultural and religions basics need to be upheld and remembered and don't want that changed --- that's what they disapprove of more that black, white, hispanic, asian, etc. And is tends to be older individuals more than younger ones.
Somehow I doubt they'd take issue with my dating a swede, since we're both white.

Of course, there would still be the same cultural and religious differences...

Ask them how they'd feel about an ex-amish person marrying your average white guy or gal. Talk about cultural and religious differences.
I'm sure they'll say it wouldn't be okay, because that backs their stance, but if confronted with that particular scene outside the context of racial segregation, they wouldn't blink.

I have to admit, I am sadly surprised that this is even a question anymore. Of course, since there is a discussion, it obviously needs to be discussed. But I was taken by surprise to see it.

[Turtleheadfred]

SydneyP - I don't ask them anything. I appreciate that they at least try to explain their stance to me in a respectful, polite manner, even if I don't agree with it. There's no point in my arguing with a friend (and therefore making an enemy of them) when we simply have a difference of opinion. I obviously don't agree with them, but that doesn't mean we can't be friends.

They are entitled to feel the way they do, as am I.

I too am constantly surprised when racism raises it's ugly head and slaps me every once in a while, but sadly it still does. However, rather than look at the negative, I choose to be positive and be thankful for the advances we've made, and hope and pray we can continue toward those advances so that one day this won't even be an issue for anyone.

As for the Swedish thing... I dated a young man from Sweden in college, and if we had gotten very serious, yes - it would have been an issue for my family. Why? Because in his culture (as he explained it to me) marraige is simply a formality and nothing more. If someone wants to have children, have them! and by as many different fathers/mothers as you want. But for him - his family had "chosen" who his wife would be and that is who would eventually have to marry. He was here in TN studying, she at UCLA. But both were free to date anyone they wanted, have children, live with people, etc.... but one day - they would be married. I even got to meet here and she was a very nice girl.

Obviously, this didn't work for me either - but I still consider him a very good friend. But that belief didn't work for me - obviously - which was the sole reason I stopped dating him. I felt it was unfair to me and her - but he honestly never could understand. ;)

[Sydneyp]

But that belief didn't work for me - obviously - which was the sole reason I stopped dating him. I felt it was unfair to me and her - but he honestly never could understand.
LOL - I don't really get the arranged marriage thing, it's not common in Sweden among swedes.
But the rest of it I do get, it's very swedish. And it doesn't surprise me at all that he couldn't understand...very very swedish.

My point wasn't that culture is not an issue in relationships, it very much is. My point was that people who say it is cultural in a discussion on race are trying to hide their bigotry (maybe even from themselves.) Though I think the separation of races is wrong, if someone can just come out and say, "I don't like it" without making up all kinds of hooey psuedo reasons, I can at least understand.

My biggest cultural shocker in dating actually came from a guy who had grown up in the projects of Patterson NJ. This was odd because about 50% of the guys I've dated are not from North America originally. I always felt that it worked well with the non-americans because we both KNEW we came from different cultures, the differences were obvious. It was an american who showed me that not everyone here has the same values as the people I grew up with.

[Turtleheadfred]

That's funny Syd! My worst experiences (slightly off subject) were with guys from my "Christian college" that were supposed to be "christian"! :eek: At one point I went home after a particularly irritating date and told my mother I preferred sinners! They were MUCH more gentlemanly and polite! :D

[Sexy Strawberry]

Race doesn't matter to me. Actually, I would LOVE to marry someone from another race and a completely different culture :D, I could learn a lot from him!

I would like to marry someone from another country and that spoke a different language, if we had children they would be multi-cultural, bilingual and I think that's great!

[Mariaxx]

dunno really surpose it depends who/wot u like lol

[shilobee]

Originally posted by Turtleheadfred
told my mother I preferred sinners! They were MUCH more gentlemanly and polite! :D

Funny how that works, eh?:D