Seen me on Dr. Phil

[time2fly]

Caught about 20 minutes of Dr. Phil today (one of my favorite shows). But kids didn't allow me to watch the rest. Anyhow, seen ME on there! SEX? I don't know why, but it is such an issue with me. I can't seem to get into it. After 21 years together, my dear dh is still very patient with me. Anyone else see this show today? Can you relate? Makes me wonder how our parents handled this 30 years ago. My mom tells me she just gave in to my dad's demands, when he wanted it. I can't even imagine that!!!! And she had 5 kids in 6 years, having to HAND WASH diapers and all! Me and my kid sister (child #6 and 7) came along 3 years later. But, anyhow, can anyone relate with me? I want to have sex. But the desire just isn't like it was 20 years ago. I have to agree with many other women on the Dr. Phil show, the most romantic thing my husband can do for me is to help lighten my load around the house...do some dishes, laundry, clean up and help take care of our 3 kids. Hope I don't sound like a whiner. Cuz I'm thankful that I'm a stay at home mom. But I only get a break when dh is home from work. Please share!

[Cheatara]

hmm, well I didn't see dr. phil, and I'm only 24. But anyway, I'm not very into sex. Before getting pregnant I did have a sex drive that was equal (and sometimes greater than) to my husbands, but after reading boards and stuff I think they are both pretty low (2 times a week at the very most). While pregnant (both times) I've had no sex drive what-so-ever. Which is good I guess cause with my first pregnancy I was put on pelvic rest at 20 weeks and this time I was put on pelvic rest at 6 weeks, so we couldn't do it even if we wanted to. In between pregnancies my sex drive was basically non existant, but I was (still am actually) breast feeding.

[Tigerlily]

I can relate. I'm 33 and I haven't been in the mood since I was in my first trimester and my baby is now 6 months old. I'm breastfeeding, so I don't see breasts being sexual anymore, frankly I'm turned off when hubby is interested in them! I just hope it goes away when I'm done BF'ing Erin (around 1 year).

[HeavenLeigh]

I can sort of relate, in a different way tho.

When I was married I hated sex, because I hated my now ex H. It made me physically ill when he touched me. I could have went the rest of my life w/out sex with him anyhow.
Since the divorce my sex drive has returned full force. I still get into slumps where it seems more like a chore than a pleasure.....when I'm really tired, stressed out, have a lot of things on my mind, etc... I think that may be your problem. Your hubby works and I'm sure he's tired but you take care of 3children all day every day. I know you have to be exhausted. Hubby has a clock in time and clock out time plus scheduled days off. You work 24/7 365. I'm sure you also take care of the house, write out the bills, cook, and take the kiddies everywhere they need to go. No wonder you don't have a sex drive!
I would suggest taking time out for you. Don't worry about hubby right now. Worry about you. Ask him for a maid service one day a week as your Christmas gift. Or hire a trustworthy teen to come over one day a week and do the major things around the house or sit with the children while you lock yourself up in the bathroom and take a bubble bath, go shopping, or find a dark corner somewhere and sleep for a few hours. I don't know about your budget (God only knows right now I couldn't hire a mouse to eat crumbs off my floor) but if you can't afford help try to find some freebies. There should be a lot of programs for families that can't afford daycare to cover the expenses. Take them one day a week and just lay around, do something you enjoy, or pamper youself that one day.
When you start to feel like you're doing something for yourself (you do for everyone else.....you have to take time for you) then you will feel better and more relaxed. The rest will come naturally.