tifferoo
01-30-2004, 10:55 AM
Sorry yall, this is very long. Df and I had our first big fight last night. :cry: Wednesday I was so mad with him. :vent: We had gone to see the site he booked for our wedding (it was my first time seeing it). I liked it but I pictured more for my wedding ceremony site. Afterwards I asked him to drive to another site that someone else had recommended for us as well. When we got there, I noticed that they had a cute chapel on the grounds. So when we got to the office I asked questions about rental and they gave me a rate sheet to look at first. I saw that the chapel rented for a reasonable amount of money but so as the lady was showing us the banquet rooms, I started asking questions about the chapel and I asked if we could look at it as well. She told me that we could look through the window but no one was available at that moment to take us over there. We knew right off that the banquet rooms weren't for us because they were small but I wanted to go and check out the chapel because I thought that this could be another option since we wouldn't be able to book a church on Sunday morning anyway for our Wedding.
When we got out of the bldg. heading back to the car, df says to me "Why are you wasting our time going to look at that chapel?" I said that I just wanted to look at it because if it was nice and we booked it, it prevent us from having to rent the reception site for the entire weekend for wedding decorations. And I am thinking :stupid:. He drove over there with a big attitude (mind you, my mom went with us as well). He pulls over to the side of the chapel and I said if you don't want to get out and look, you don't have to. Well needless to say, he didn't get out. I looked into it and it wasn't a huge chapel, but I felt like it could work for us. I get back into the vehicle and my mom asked me how did I like it and I told her that I would talk to her about it later. Df and I didn't say anthing to each other for the entire ride back home. When we dropped my mom off at home, I stayed in the vehicle to talk to df and I asked him why he shut down like that when I wanted to look at the chapel and he said that he thought that we had decided to have our wedding/reception in the same place. I told him that we made that decision due to the fact that we wanted leave for our honeymoon directly after our wedding which leaves that Sunday, the day of the wedding. We knew that everyone in creation would be having church service that morning so it was no way that we could have the wedding in a church since we were forced to have a morning wedding until I found this chapel. It is 5 mins away from our reception site so I couldn't understand why he didn't want the wedding there. So he tells me that he had counted on having the wedding/reception in the same place so we could spend more time with our families. He then tells me that he would have to pray about it. I told him that he could have at least looked at the chapel since he knew that I always wanted a church wedding. I got out the vehicle and we talked later that day but he never said anymore about it.
Then yesterday he called me but he never brought it up again. Later in the conversation, he tells me that although he didn't agree with me about not putting the registry cards in our invitations (he wants them in there) we could not put them in there and that we could just agree to not agree about it. I then told him that he was just giving in on that issue so I would be forced to give in on the chapel issue. He starts to laugh and say "it's funny how you women think". By this point I am :fmad:. He then tells me that he didn't have a chance to pray about it but he was going to pray that God would change my mind about wanting to have the wedding there! The nerve of him! I thought that a wedding was supposed to be mostly the bride's special day! I then told him that I prayed to God to soften his heart about not having the wedding there and I asked him who did he think God should listen to, him or me (that was a stupid question to ask, I see that now...lol). He told me that he thought that the chapel was too small and all of our family and friends wouldn't be able to fit in there. I told him that I wasn't getting married to show off to people and to have everybody there, if that was the case, we could have gotten married on a Saturday and everyone in creation would come. He picked our wedding date which just so happened to be on a Sunday. I wanted a beautiful spiritual wedding that was in a church on a Sunday. I have been planning since day one to be in a church. He then tells me that a church is just a building and that we could put a sign outside of the reception hall for that day re-naming it for our church. Again I think :stupid:. He said if we have it in two places, we couldn't spend as much time with our families. I keep saying over and over, I don't care who is there, the most important thing is that we are getting married to each other. The president could be there and I wouldn't pay any attention to nobody but my new husband. He then tells me that if I want to, I can change the wedding to Saturday and we can have the wedding at any church that we want to have it in! I told him that I didn't want to do that either and after a moment of silence from both of us, he tells me "I love you and good night!" and hangs up the phone. I was so mad, all I could do was crawl in the bed and cover my head! He called me back at 12 to ask me a question about my mama but that was it. I went to bed mad and I never wanted it to be like that.
Do you think that I am in the wrong about this?
When we got out of the bldg. heading back to the car, df says to me "Why are you wasting our time going to look at that chapel?" I said that I just wanted to look at it because if it was nice and we booked it, it prevent us from having to rent the reception site for the entire weekend for wedding decorations. And I am thinking :stupid:. He drove over there with a big attitude (mind you, my mom went with us as well). He pulls over to the side of the chapel and I said if you don't want to get out and look, you don't have to. Well needless to say, he didn't get out. I looked into it and it wasn't a huge chapel, but I felt like it could work for us. I get back into the vehicle and my mom asked me how did I like it and I told her that I would talk to her about it later. Df and I didn't say anthing to each other for the entire ride back home. When we dropped my mom off at home, I stayed in the vehicle to talk to df and I asked him why he shut down like that when I wanted to look at the chapel and he said that he thought that we had decided to have our wedding/reception in the same place. I told him that we made that decision due to the fact that we wanted leave for our honeymoon directly after our wedding which leaves that Sunday, the day of the wedding. We knew that everyone in creation would be having church service that morning so it was no way that we could have the wedding in a church since we were forced to have a morning wedding until I found this chapel. It is 5 mins away from our reception site so I couldn't understand why he didn't want the wedding there. So he tells me that he had counted on having the wedding/reception in the same place so we could spend more time with our families. He then tells me that he would have to pray about it. I told him that he could have at least looked at the chapel since he knew that I always wanted a church wedding. I got out the vehicle and we talked later that day but he never said anymore about it.
Then yesterday he called me but he never brought it up again. Later in the conversation, he tells me that although he didn't agree with me about not putting the registry cards in our invitations (he wants them in there) we could not put them in there and that we could just agree to not agree about it. I then told him that he was just giving in on that issue so I would be forced to give in on the chapel issue. He starts to laugh and say "it's funny how you women think". By this point I am :fmad:. He then tells me that he didn't have a chance to pray about it but he was going to pray that God would change my mind about wanting to have the wedding there! The nerve of him! I thought that a wedding was supposed to be mostly the bride's special day! I then told him that I prayed to God to soften his heart about not having the wedding there and I asked him who did he think God should listen to, him or me (that was a stupid question to ask, I see that now...lol). He told me that he thought that the chapel was too small and all of our family and friends wouldn't be able to fit in there. I told him that I wasn't getting married to show off to people and to have everybody there, if that was the case, we could have gotten married on a Saturday and everyone in creation would come. He picked our wedding date which just so happened to be on a Sunday. I wanted a beautiful spiritual wedding that was in a church on a Sunday. I have been planning since day one to be in a church. He then tells me that a church is just a building and that we could put a sign outside of the reception hall for that day re-naming it for our church. Again I think :stupid:. He said if we have it in two places, we couldn't spend as much time with our families. I keep saying over and over, I don't care who is there, the most important thing is that we are getting married to each other. The president could be there and I wouldn't pay any attention to nobody but my new husband. He then tells me that if I want to, I can change the wedding to Saturday and we can have the wedding at any church that we want to have it in! I told him that I didn't want to do that either and after a moment of silence from both of us, he tells me "I love you and good night!" and hangs up the phone. I was so mad, all I could do was crawl in the bed and cover my head! He called me back at 12 to ask me a question about my mama but that was it. I went to bed mad and I never wanted it to be like that.
Do you think that I am in the wrong about this?